A lot has been said about the artist and her brand. She has various critical and excoriation, but not nearly enough has been said about her skin. I have wondered to myself, "Why does she always look vaguely wet-ish?" Team Abramovi is so happy to announce the release of the Longevity Method skincare and wellbeing line. It is a bold artistic move that can only reinforce our facial elasticity even as it cements Abramovi's reputation as a "shaman of late capitalism."
The products are an extension of the artist's already thriving Longevity Method platform, which includes instruction cards that will help you fix your life with prompts. If you can't afford this, you can try other aspects of the Abramovi oeuvre that are free, such as going for a nice long walk or screaming into your boyfriend's face. The promotional video for the line is largely indistinguishable from any of her fine art videos. The hands are covered in primary-color paint. The Longevity Method collection goes for £459 ($582) and is inspired by the philosophy of healing through nature. White bread and white wine are notoriously effective for engendering a sense of well-being, though lesser minds might recommend putting them inside your face rather than on top of it. It is possible that this routine is healing through nature in the same way that horse manure is good for nurturing soil. The artist is standing by to take your credit card information.